User blog:DancePowderer/Creepy Vs Sleepy Round 2
This is a rematch between Zoro and Hody. Again, hilarity is the goal here. In the dungeon of Ryugu Palace: Zoro: HEY! Let us go! Jones: No. Zoro: Please? Jones: No. Zoro: Pretty please? Jones: Uh-uh. Zoro: Pretty please with sugar on top? Jones: Nope. Zoro: Pretty please if I kick your ass? Jones (sighs): Fair enough. You! Peon, bring me their weapons and stuff. Peon #1: Here you go sir. Jones: Ok, skinny had the cane, skinny had the slingshot and purse, and death wish had the swords. Everyone puts their gear back on. Zoro (pulls out a sword): Ok, but this dungeon is kind of narrow, don't you have a bigger room? Jones: Yeah, follow me. He leads Zoro out of the dungeon and the two start to walk, guards escorting them. Zoro: Are we there yet? Jones: No. Zoro: How about now? Jones: Yes. They enter a circular room, with rafters for spectators. There is also a conveniently placed hot tub/wading pool. Jones: Your friends can watch us from up there. Zoro: There isn't a chamber orchestra hidden anywhere in here, is there? Jones: What? No... Anyway, before we begin, are you sure you want to do this? We are underwater and I can sink this place if I want to. Zoro: Yeah, I'm sure. You may not know this, but I'm actually a shark? Jones: Huh? Zoro (pulls out a sword and places it on his head with the blade facing forward): I am now. Dadat...Dadat... Dadat dadat dadat dadat dadat CRASH (Jaws theme). Jones: That just made me feel less bad about considering showing mercy. He walks over to the pool and dunks his arms in. Jones: Archer Shark Barrage! He flings his arms at Zoro repeatedly. Zoro: Disaster Harbor Bird! He blocks the water bullets, having only a few hit him, the rest hitting the back wall. Zoro: Mad Cow Graze! He draws his sword and charges at Jones with his sword fully extended and his arm rigid. Jones (Pulls his fist back): A bit forward, don't you think? Zoro gets close to Jones but instead makes a u-turn before getting too close to Jones, keeping the same pose. Jones: What the-? Zoro: Who said I wanted to get near a smelly fish face like you? I just wanted to connect the symmetry. Jones: What are you talkiing about? Zoro (points): The now almost-trapezoid on you stomach. Jones (Looks down): How the hell did you do that? On his stomach is a fresh cut line that is connecting his scars (it looks like \___/) Zoro: Just because I didn't touch you, doesn't mean I didn't cut you. Jones: You filthy human! Zoro: You know, human isn't the only thing I can be. Jones: What do you mean? You don't have one of those Zoan Curses I've heard about, do you? Zoro: Nope. He points two swords upward and places them on his ears. Zoro: Now I'm a bunny. He puts the hilts of his swords just under his nose. Zoro: Now I'm a saber tooth tiger. He puts a sword on his forehead. Zoro: Now I'm a rhino. He then crosses his arms and puts his swords back by his ears. Jones: Are you a bunny again? Zoro: No. I'm a bull. Oni-Giri! He kicks off from the ground and flies toward Jones. Jones: Well that's new...and fast...Oh crap! Zoro crashes into him, leaving an x mark in the middle of Jones' stomach, so it kinda looks like \_X_/ Jones flies into the wall, stunned, but still able to fight. Zoro: I guess you've let out the animal in me. Jones (dusting himself off): Very good, Zoro, but I too can be multiple things. He kicks off from the ground and flies toward Zoro (kinda like Arlong did). Jones: I'm a torpedooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! Zoro crosses his sword and blocks the attack, but Jones pushes him back. Zoro: You are quite strong, even on land. Jones: Wanna know what separates me from real sharks? Zoro: What? Jones (punches Zoro): My fist! Zoro: Wanna know why I was able to cut you underwater before? Jones: Why? Zoro (points at his stomach): Because you're fat. I wasn't cutting you to hurt you, I was trying out a primitive weight loss program, seeing if I could cut the fat from you! You must really hate humans since you ate your rage and expressed it at the same time, quite healthily too I might add. Jones: Oh yeah, if my weight were a problem, could I do this? He backflips to the other side of the room. Jones: Impressive, huh? Zoro: What? I wasn't looking. Hey, how did you get over there so fast? Did you roll there, tubby? Jones: Do you want to die painfully or quickly? Zoro: Before I answer that, look at my friends, now back to me, back at my friends, now back to me. I am not my friends, I'm flipping you off. Now I'm over here. Look up, look down, look all around, now I'm right in front of you. Look at my thumb. Gee, you're dumb, I just stabbed you in the chest! Now my sword has blood on it. It's been fun fighting you. Hey, Usopp, drop me your heaviest hammer. Usopp drops it down, it hits Jones in the head, with an audible crack. Usopp: Did you get it? Zoro: No, but good enough, you did it for me. Usopp: Ok. Zoro: I'm bored, let's find the others. And they wander the castle for hours, as Zoro was leading them around. Category:Blog posts